Memories...

Memories...

 

The old woman sat quietly in the ancient bentwood rocker. Sunshine streamed through the large bay windows next to her…gently warming her withered face. The light reflected from her soft, white hair, creating a halo effect. Memories settling in…days gone by. The chair began to rock slowly as her foot softly tapped the worn carpet…her empty arms recalling the softness of baby blankets… a smile crept across her thin, pale lips. The memory tugged at her heart…tears slipping silently from the crinkled corners of faded blue eyes. Anniversaries, birthdays, vacations, road trips, holidays…all filled with family, love, and laughter… crowded her thoughts. A small sigh of contentment escaped her lips as the remembrance of a husband, lover, best friend, confidante, and partner in crime…of 75 years moved across the stage of her mind.

 And so went the remains of the afternoon…as the sun set in the most brilliant hues of rose, coral, and sapphire…she drifted away …surrounded by the warmth of a life well lived…and well-remembered. She left the old chair without hesitation. He opened the door for her…as he had always opened doors for her…and took her hand…as he had always taken her hand...and they began the long walk through eternity.

A cool winter memory on this hot summer day...

The cold wind tousles my hair gently as big, white, glittering flakes swirl all around. I sit quietly on the wooden bench in the middle of the deserted park, underneath the soft glow of an old fashioned, wrought iron street light. The great silence in the night wraps around me like a familiar blanket…comforting my soul…warming my heart. Slides, swings, and merry-go-rounds empty…resting…coated in white softness. I am saddened momentarily, as I realize that I alone am privy to this magic winter moment…as the world around me sleeps. Then…joy overcomes the sadness…as I realize that I alone…am privy to this magic winter moment…as the world around me sleeps…

Week 12...unemployment...

Here we are...week 12 of Marvin's unemployment since the closing of Netlink. He is applying for all sorts of positions...at all sorts of places...with all sorts of salary ranges. He has had several interviews, and each one sounds hopeful...but then the position goes to someone else. I know he is so discouraged. I feel awful for him...it has only been a little over a year since I was in his place...I remember all too well how hopeless it begins to feel.

My birthday was last week...I turned the dreaded 60. At least everyone around me seemed to think that it was dreaded. I honestly don't feel any different than I did a week ago, or a month ago, or a year ago...it is only a number...I will continue to be as old as I feel.

I have been trying desperately to lose some weight for a couple of months now. I got a fitbit from my son for Christmas and have been logging a lot of distance each day/week. I really thought that I had cut down on my food intake as well...but it has not helped. So...today I began to log my food in Spark People again...hopefully I will turn a corner this week and begin to see some tonnage fall off!

It was a good weekend! On Saturday, my daughter and I took my granddaughter to see Disney On Ice Princesses and Heroes. It was amazing! My granddaughter (S) is only three and a half...but she was mesmerized! I have to say that I was as well! The costumes, choreography, and performers were stellar! We had an amazing time!

After Disney On Ice, we went to my sons house for a barbeque followed by S'Mores on the firepit! It was a beautiful evening to be outdoors! We had a great time with my son, his partner, his partners parents, and friends! They have such a lovely home and patio...and they always bring entertaining to a whole new level! It was wonderful! We left a bit earlier than we wanted to...due to my husbands pain meds wearing off and not wanting the pain in his leg/foot to get out of control.

I am trying to write again...it seems like there is never time for me to sit down and put pen to paper. Blogging is part of that effort!

Be Well!

Grammy Fashion???

I usually browse YAHOO on Monday mornings…to see what has happened over the weekend in the world at large. As I was perusing it this morning, the first tab was Best and Worst Grammy looks. Naturally, I clicked on it…expecting to see some gorgeous attire…and of course, a few not so gorgeous. What I found was so ridiculous that I had to comment.

When did the red carpet become a runway for Halloween costumes? Seriously….what is going on in the minds of…a bunch of people???? The following were absolutely unbelievable…

1.       Yahoo Style Editors said that Beyonce in Custom Proenza Schouler, was one of the best. Apparently they are huge fans of the Morticia Addams look.

2.       Yahoo Style Editors said that Rihanna in Giambattista Valli Couture was one of the best. This dress was absolutely ridiculous…it looks like a gigantic pink blob of cotton candy with a head poking out the top…or possibly the worst bridesmaids dress of all time.

3.       Yet another of Yahoo Style Editors best includes Madonna in Givenchy Couture. Holy cow…are you serious? A nightmare…void of any semblance of class or elegance. One has to wonder if perhaps she took a wrong turn…and was possibly en route to a costume party.

4.       In the midst of all of the horrific best choices…they actually labeled Taylor Swift in Elie Saab as one of the worst. While I don’t care for her music…she looked classy, elegant, and appropriate.

5.       Another of the awful best choices is Nicki Minaj in Tom Ford.   Hmmm…apparently, Ms. Minaj has no mirrors in the house…and Yahoo Style Editors are blind.

6.       I was really disappointed in their label of Best for Kelly Osbourne in Christian Siriano…not so much for Yahoo Style Editors as for Ms. Osbourne. I am a fan of Kelly Osbourne…she always looks fabulous. Sadly…she looked like she was wearing her grandmother’s cast off…matronly and boring.

7.  Pharrell Williams in Adidas 3M also ranked among their best. The caption read, “Chicest couple in     town”. I don’t know what town they are referring to, but I will make my best effort not to ever go there. He looks like an overgrown school boy on vacation…with his gym teacher.

       8. Last, but not least…Kim Kardashian in Jean Paul Gaultier was called out for being one of the worst dressed. I absolutely agree with this assessment.  She is becoming almost cartoonish…a caricature of herself. We have begun to wait to see what her ridiculous look will be each day…what new fashion faux pas will attack her…sad…sad…sad.

New Year...

And so we begin the New Year…as always hoping for prosperity and good fortune, health and happiness, and that thing so elusive…peace of mind. I say to 2014…not a fond farewell, but a bitter goodbye. It seems that we have struggled for a very long time now…in all things really…but particularly in job and financial issues.

 

My husband worked his last day on December 19^th, 2014. He had been with this company for almost three years. The company that he worked for contracted with a larger company and the larger company was sold. All contracts were off and replaced with new companies. So…here we go again.

 

During the last few years, we have been through five stints of unemployment between us. Me twice and him three times (counting this one). It seems that just as we begin to fully recover and settle in…we get hit again. Each time a new job is found…it pays less than the one before it…so our income has steadily declined.

 

We are pretty much resigned to losing the house this time around. Events over the last couple of weeks regarding unemployment have made this even more of a certainty.

 

He initially filed for unemployment and received a letter stating that he did indeed qualify, and including the amount he would receive. The following week he filed his first claim for the previous week…and somehow checked the wrong box…stating that he was unavailable for work that week. As soon as he submitted the claim, he received a notification that since he was unable to work, he would need to submit more forms. He was absolutely aghast. He immediately submitted the required forms…I faxed them in the following day…each one with a hand written explanation from him stating that he was definitely able, willing, and ready to work each day of the week in question, and that he had mistakenly checked the wrong box.

 

We waited…nothing. He checked the status of his claim…and it remained ineligible. A week passed…no word…no change. He submitted the next weeks claim. During the process, he hit a different date in the drop down…and a claim was submitted for the wrong week. Yesterday he spent almost two hours on hold…after calling the number for claims…and received no answer. The two hours on hold did however use almost our entire amount of calling minutes for this billing period.

 

We had figured our income…with his unemployment…and a significant drop in my salary (due to now paying for insurance for both of us) and determined that we could manage about 90 days before needing to put the house on the market. However, with two full weeks of unemployment now lost…and no idea if or when it will be fixed…that time is decreasing quickly.

 

If the unemployment situation isn’t rectified by the end of this week…I will begin to search for a weekend job. I won’t be able to make enough to keep the house…but maybe enough to stay out of a foreclosure situation until we can sell it.

 

It has been so long since I blogged regularly, that I am sure no one is even checking anymore…and that is okay. I just needed to unload my brain a bit.

 

If anyone is out there…

 

Be well and Happy New Year.